I don't want to die. I don't. I'm too young, have too many places I need to go see, and too many things I haven't gotten to do with my life, but I am slowly killing myself with my weight. That's why I'm starting this blog: to have a place where I will honestly chronicle this year of my life. The year I will have Roux-en-y Gastric Bypass.
No holds barred, no lies, no evasions. Just the truth.
I've always been the "Big Girl". Growing up I was always taller and bigger than my peers, and I didn't think anything of it until I was 9 and the kids in fourth grade started taunting me. Looking back now at pictures, I wasn't over-weight: I was inches taller and a little chubby, but not over-weight. But to my eyes I was suddenly a whale, and that's the way I've seen myself ever since.
I've steadily put on weight ever since. I've always been active (I have horses, and there is almost nothing more physically demanding than barn work and riding, plus I swam competitively and jogged), I've been on every diet you can think of, and several I hope you never will. Every time I would loose a few pounds, I would gain it back plus 10-20 pounds.
Now I'm 5'10" and almost 300 pounds. And I'm finally doing something about it. It's not been an easy decision, but I am in the beginning processes of Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass. As soon as my new insurance card gets to me in a few weeks (Thank you ObabaCare!), I am marching off to the hospital of my choice and starting the pre-op appointments and classes. I hope to have the surgery at the end of June, July, or at the very latest the beginning of August. Who knows, maybe I'll be crafty and get the surgery during my seven week break between horse shows, lol!
In anticipation of surgery, I went and joined back up at my old gym today. I figured that if I start getting back in shape now then I'll have an easier recovery post-surgery, not to mention the added bonus of getting back in shape in time for horse-show season. I'm lucky that four or five of my good friends also joined the same gym, so I have work-out buddies this time around.
I can't really afford it, but I'll find a way to make it work.
That's all the time I have for now, but I'll be back to let you all know about tomorrow's workout.
